THIS IS MALAYSIAN (nice)

This is Malaysia - and you should know -

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR HAIR LOSS:

Ajinomoto

NATIONAL INSTANT FOOD:

Maggi Mee

NATIONAL BREAKFAST:

Nasi Lemak

NATIONAL LUNCH:

Nasi Ayam

NATIONAL SUPPER:

Roti Canai & Teh Tarik

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR BEING LATE:

Traffic Jam

NATIONAL FRUIT FOR INDUCING MENSTRUATION:

Pineapple

NATIONAL APHRODISIAC DRINK:

Stout. Many Malaysian men swear by it. But then after

a few pints they start swearing at everything.. .

NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (MEN):

Food Poisoning

NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (WOMEN):

Menstrual Pain

NATIONAL CURE FOR DIARRHOEA :

Cap Kaki Tiga. Down one bottle with warm water and you are

all "dried up".

NATIONAL CURE FOR HEADACHES:

Panadol.. The "cure for all". If it fails we have another secret

weapon - Tiger Balm.

NATIONAL CURE FOR NAUSEA :

Moh Fah Kor.

NATIONAL CURE FOR DIZZINESS:

Minyak Angin Cap Kapak.

NATIONAL CAUSE OF DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES):

Happy Hours.

NATIONAL INSTANT CURE FOR DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES):

The sight of a police road block.

NATIONAL RICE COOKER :

NATIONAL Rice Cooker

NATIONAL RUBBISH DUMP:

Anywhere. As long as it is not your house.

NATIONAL MOST MIS-PRONOUNCED NAME:

Carrefour. Sometimes even pronounced as Carry 4!

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR BEING NICE:

Running For Election

NATIONAL ANSWER FOR "WHERE ARE YOU"?:

-on the way.

NATIONAL OFFICIAL TIME FOR BEING LATE:

-10 minutes ----> Sure ah???

NATIONAL REASON FOR PRICE INCREASE:

Petrol naik lagi kawan... semua barang pun kena naik ler...

inclusive of chicken meat?

NATIONAL REASON FOR PETROL INCREASE:

Still cheaper than other country la....

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR CAUSING TRAFFIC JAM:

there was accident on the other side of the road.. of course

must slow down and tengok-tengok, kaypoh-kaypoh lah!

NATIONAL REASON WHEN REJECTING INVITATION ?

'I got some work to do la..u all go first la..'

NATIONAL REASON FOR COLLAPSED BUILDINGS & LEAKY PARLIAMENT ROOFS:

An act of God. Definitely nothing to with greased palms and

poor quality control. Nope, none whatsoever.

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR IRRESPONSIBLE POLITICAL STATEMENTS:

None. We were misquoted.

NATIONAL MINISTERIAL REASON FOR INCREASING TOLL RATES:

Orang cakap mau naik mesti mau naik lah! Lu ingat ini jalan saya

punya bapak punya kah?!

NATIONAL REASON FOR HAVING BIG ONION DOMES ON TAXPAYER-FUNDED PUBLIC

BUILDINGS:

....dunno. (It's not as if we're anywhere near the middle east.)

NATIONAL REASON FOR SPURNING BAILOUT PACKAGES FROM FOREIGN CAR COMPANIES:

We're about to unveil another badly designed low budget car, which,

coupled with our notorious customer service and corporate mismanagement,

will see us bankrupt again within the next 5 years. And so we have

absolutely

no need for the Germans and their silly car-making and market-positioning

know ho w, thank you very much.

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR JUMPING QUEUE (TRAFFIC JAM OR WHAT EVER QUEUE):

...... everybody doing what lah............

NATIONAL EXCUSE NOT PAYING SAMAN ACCORDING TO DUE DATE:

Relax ler... government will give discount one of these days

NATIONAL EXCUSE TO BRIBE (ANY CONDITION):

........ give them minum kopi lar......